once we live:

Dear Lover,

Why are we so afraid to talk to the gorgeous stranger when we have nothing to lose?

Why is the person we like usually the last person we say hi to in a room?

Why do we use people we don’t like to make the ones we do jealous?

Why do we purposely leave a location alone, wishing the person we like will follow us? Why can’t we just grab their hand and run away together?

Why do we pretend we have somewhere to go and something to do when we’re in the middle of a meaningful interaction? Why do we avoid potential awkward silences when we actually would give anything to spend a whole night with the person?

Why do we make excuses to visit someone or invite them over when we really just want another glimpse of their beautiful face?

Why do we purposely talk about things that lead to hugs when we really just want to say that we want the other person in our arms?

Why do we wait forever online just to see if the person we like will start a conversation with us? Why do we wait for reciprocation when we have a screaming desire to say hello?

Why do we show off to the person we like when we should be letting our guards down to let them into our lives?

Why do we use reasoning to think a future relationship through so “our friendship won’t be ruined” when love is not a thing of logic but a thing of emotion?

Why do so few people’s “looking for” section of their Facebook profile mention a relationship when actually nearly all of us are waiting for someone to sweep us off our feet?

Why are we so intrigued by the phrase “We always want what we can’t have” that sometimes–whether consciously or not–we control our situations to make it relevant to our lives when we say no to someone we like so much? Why don’t we want what we could get?

Why do we turn someone down a few times so we seem more socially valued–only to accidentally let them slip away?

Why do we put up a wall to protect ourselves from the person who might protect us best?

Why are we all so proud that we won’t admit to liking someone?

Why are we all so prejudiced that we pick out reasons why we should wait for “another one”?

Why are we all so jealous of relationships when we never cherish our own chances?

Why are we all so afraid of showing positive emotions?

Why are we all so passionate about being independent and free but not about being interdependent and connected?

Why can’t we all embrace love?

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Skeptic,

there’s enough help in the world
but not enough people asking for it.

there’s enough friendliness in the world,
but not enough people admitting they need it.

and there’s enough love in the world,
but not enough people open to it.

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Aging,

“At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child, or a parent.”
- Barbara Bush

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Singer (in every metaphorical sense of the word),

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear World,

After watching the 113th Boston Marathon, I wrote this piece:

an ethiopian finished first, a kenyan finished second, an american finished third. an american finished ahead of a kenyan, a kenyan finished ahead of an ethiopian. a brazilian carried his flag, a korean wore hers as a pin, a south african wore his national colors. a brit sang her country’s anthem, a russian thought it was beautiful. an irish slowed down to take in the music, a chinese sped up to do the same. another brit fell down and couldn’t. an italian cheered him on, an israeli helped him up. a mexican dropped her flag, an iranian avoided stepping on it, a swede picked it up. and a costa rican smiled.

wishful thinking?

why are we all a race?
why do we all race?
and why are they the same word anyway?

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Student,

“The most important function of education at any level is to develop the personality of the individual and the significance of his life to himself and to others.”
- Grayson Kirk

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Sharer and Artist,

For Spring Break, my friends and I went to Maine, then drove two cars from there to Quebec. During one of our long car rides, the people in each car didn’t see the people in the other car for hours. Then there was even one time that the other car got left behind because of a red light.

Our cars became so disconnected, with one trying to catch up to the other.

The “disconnect” could’ve been–and was–solved when Kimrey simply called the other car to tell them where we were waiting for them. But even after the issue was handled, Mike said to Kimrey, “Hey, tell them to also turn the radio to 93.3. ‘Kiss from a Rose’ by Seal is playing!”

It was such an innocent request, but I couldn’t help but be reminded of two things:

First, I was reminded that one part of the Chinese character for “friend” includes two pictographs of the moon side by side. It was derived that way because even if two friends are on different sides of the world, they can always share the moon. When one can’t see it anymore, the other can, and it’ll always remind them of each other.

Sharing isn’t limited to a candy bar, a carpool ride, or even a bank account. There are many things we can metaphorically and still effectively share: music, laughter, compliments, thank-you’s, the moon.

And second, I was reminded of one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. Two years ago as I was walking to class, I saw two homeless guys sitting close together in a corner, one holding a shabby-looking radio close enough to both their ears so they could hear whatever music they could through the static.

But I don’t think they were just sharing a radio. I think they were sharing an experience.

I used to struggle in defending the usefulness of being a film major and how art–whether film, music, literature, theater, or traditional visual arts–is as important as engineering, medicine, law, and the other “practical” studies. But now I remind people that art can educate us by showing how things are, can inspire us by showing what others can do, can empower us by showing what we can do, but most importantly, can connect us by showing, relating, and sharing the common human experience.

How many times have you had a rough day but instead of talking to someone, all you needed to do was listen to one or two songs?

How many times have you turned to what you’ve seen in movies to decide how to act in a certain situation because you’ve never encountered it or even witnessed it in real life?

How many times have you read a passage in a book and couldn’t help but highlight it because it so poetically described all your aspirations, fears, love, and pain?

Making art is a means of sharing, and it’s one of the most selfless things a human can do.

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Lover,

I have never been so bothered by a game show question in my life.

In a Celebrity Family Feud episode, one of the questions was “Name something a woman might do if she found out her boyfriend was cheating on her.”

The survey revealed:

1. dump him (37 people said this)
2. hurt/kill him (30)
3. cheat on him (7)
4. hit the floozie (6)
5. damage car/tires (6)
6. destroy clothes (5)

I can sorta see how emotions can get the best of someone and cause a woman to make a decision to dump him on the spot. But maybe it’s because I’m too much of a pacifist, but “hurt/KILL” him?? As the second most common answer?!? And what about “damage car/tires” or “destory clothes”? Will those do ANYTHING? And then.. “cheat on him”?? Would eye for an eye really work for this??

I really wished the top answers were:

6. hug him
5. forgive him
4. reflect on it / learn from it
3. talk to him / vent to him
2. listen to him
1. understand him

Do these strategies not exist in this world of love? Have we really been so sucked into the soap opera drama and reality show versions of romance that we’ve been programmed to throw a fit every time we encounter an obstacle in our relationships? Is anger really the norm? the expected reaction? the preferred reaction?

In the times when we need them most, where have communication and understanding disappeared to?

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear World,

Love Always,
Nathan

Dear Lonely,

“Most people have a harder time letting themselves love than finding someone to love them.”
- Bill Russell

Love Always,
Nathan